Florida man accidentally sets record for living underwater.

Joseph Dituri, a man from Florida has accidentally set the record for living underwater. His community held wild parties with alligator dancers for him after they were notified of the achievement. Whilst the celebrations were going on, our reporters on the ground asked him how and why he was inspired to break such a difficult record. He replied, “well, I don’t even know why ever’one celebratin’. That’s how were suppose ta live. Ma gator momma always taught me an’ ma brothers and sisters to live in the water.” When our reporters heard that Mr. Dituri has an alligator mother, they asked to meet his family to confirm whether his claims were true.

Mr Dituri took our reporters around one mile away from the party to a swamp. He started whistling loudly and screaming “MAMA”. Our team felt that they had met a man suffering from severe mental illness, but a few minutes later they saw a giant female alligator swim out of the swamp and waddle right next to Mr. Dituri. He then told our news team that his mother Darlene had adopted him when he was a child and raised him ever since. The alligator had apparently taken a liking to Mr. Dituri and raised him as her own child.

With this information, our reporters were dumbfounded. They had apologized to Mr. Dituri saying that they did not initially believe him but now they do. While apologizing to the man, they noticed Ms Darleen opening her jaws and chomped on the man’s legs. She immediately started doing the death roll and separated the leg. She then proceeded to drag Mr. Dituri to the depths of the swamp. Apparently, that was just a random Alligator, and Mr. Dituri actually was suffering from delusions of having alligator parents.