Pakistan Democratic Movement, the record breakers of Pakistan
The denizens of Pakistan have been experiencing unbound elation for the past year. When the current coalition government, the Pakistan Democratic Movement illegally came into power last year, the country has seen nothing but a demolition job of records.
The citizenry of Pakistan would in former years be sorrowful to witness Pakistan had been reserved to irrelevancy; no international paper would even utter a word about the nation unless the country would be fortunate enough to be devastated by a terrorist attack prominent enough to be picked up by foreign news organizations. However, Pakistanis are delighted to know that PDM has made it their life goal to speed run the country into an early grave.
The current government of “competent” civil overlords have managed to launch the nations consumer price inflation to a staggering 31.5%. When the Indians finally do manage to create a space shuttle capable of interstellar travel, they will bear witness to Pakistan’s inflation rates floating around in space.
The sitting Prime Minister of Pakistan, Shahbaz Sharif has also decided to utilize his platform as the nation’s leader to show off his diverse collection of hats. In every public appearance he is slated for, he has managed to wear a different piece of headwear. He has stated in an interview that “I wear a different hat every time because I want to show my people what it not only means to be Pakistan’s worst leader, but also its most fashionable one!”. As the people of Pakistan starve in an endless mixture of hunger and hopelessness, they can rest assured knowing how suave the Prime Ministers hats are.
Along with these developments, the government has also made it a mission to play a cat and mouse game with having to declare a default. For months on end, Pakistanis have been inundated with potential news about their economy’s collapse. This is another tactic PDM has masterfully utilized to introduce a bit of thrill in the average Pakistanis life. As my father always used to say, “I like thrill in my life”, the government has adopted a similar philosophy.
PTI, the country’s largest and most supported political party has had to face fascist tactics from the current leadership, such as murders, assassination attempts on former Prime Minister Imran Khan’s life, censorship, unlawful imprisonments, and worst of all… playground insults. The PDM government has made it their mandate to push the country towards a wild west set of ideals. Where the strong pillage and rape the weak; where the weak are playthings of the strong. Prime Minister Shahbaz Sharif also has an excellent opportunity to try out different styles of cowboy hats when the nation is eventually plunged into a sort of 19th century American wild west type chaos.